How to Make Him Love You More

As a wife, it is one of my desires to make my husband love me more each day. It’s my prayer. It’s a longing for every woman to be passionately loved by a man.

Is there something I can do to make my husband love me more?

I am not saying this because I am not satisfied with my husband’s love. I am more than thankful for my husband. Joi is a loving husband, and his life is one of the greatest things my eyes has seen on earth. How God allowed him to go through various spiritual challenges and come out as he is right now is one of God’s miracles in his life.

Desiring for my husband to love me more is something I joyfully discovered upon digging through the wisdom God shares in His Word. One of these days, I was re-reading Elizabeth George’s A Wife After God’s Own Heart, and she mentions that there was no specific command in the Bible for the husbands to lead their wives. What the Bible instructs a husband to do is to LOVE HIS WIFE.

Husbands, love your wives,

even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

Colossians 3:19

These instructions are given along with the instructions for the wife to submit unto her husband.

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

Ephesians 5:22

Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

Ephesians 5:24

To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Titus 2:5

What has these instructions to love and to submit has to do with each other?

I realized just how wise these instructions are! These are the tips for a joyful marriage. These are the secrets to lasting marriages.

I have heard many times how wives sneer at the idea of submitting to their husbands, how even “church” women struggle at this commandment, how challenging it is to be someone considered as the “weaker vessel”.

Unfortunately, there’s so much lie and confusion connected with the Biblical idea of submission that the modern wife don’t fully understand and apply it.

I was once one of those wives who sneer at the idea of submission. I had so much pride within me that I think of myself as one who is entitled to my husband’s love without doing my part of the godly instruction.


The Lord instructed the wife to submit to her husband because it will make her husband love her more.

The husband is also instructed to love his wife because it will make his wife submit to him more.

It’s a joyful cycle which creates an atmosphere of mutual understanding and lasting love in marriage.

I want other marriages to take advantage of this amazing tip from the All-knowing Author of Love.

Side note: I am not yet perfect in terms of submission. I may be married for 12 years now, but these truths are just now glaring brightly into my life. I am still a wife who is a work-in-progress, but applying this steps into our marriage has produced amazing results!

Here are practical ways you can submit to your husband and make him love you more each day:

Pray for a submissive heart

Submission should start from the heart. Pray that the Lord will give you a sincere and humble heart. Pray that your motive will not be selfish, but that you want to submit to your husband because you love the Lord first, and your husband second. Pray that you would obey God’s command for by His grace alone and only for His glory. Ask the Lord to forgive you of your pride. Ask for more of the fruit of the Spirit to grow in your life.

Watch your words

The tongue is a wife’s weakness, and it is also her most dangerous asset, but it can be used in submissive ways, especially toward your husband. When it comes to talking about and talking to your husband, what kind of language do you use? You should always try to use the following languages that show your submission and love towards your husband:

  • Respectful words
  • Thankful words
  • Encouraging words

Your husband would be inspired to love you more and lead you better if he hears these kinds of words from you. These words make a wife more beautiful in the sight of her husband.

Act with humility

Your emotions and speech are not the only ones to reflect your submissiveness. Your actions speak louder than words. Practice humility in the way you deal with the everyday tasks you undertake. Let the children see you practicing humility in and outside the home. Do not fake humility. As mentioned, ask the Lord’s help to give you a submissive heart that will eventually pour out of the work of your hands.

Humble acts can be seen in the following:

  • Modesty in your appearance
  • Contentment in your lifestyle
  • Service to others
  • Sacrifices

A submissive wife who does these and more will gain more love from her husband. And not only that, the Lord will reward her more abundantly for being obedient to His commandments.

Being submissive has all the positive effects not only in your marriage, but in your life in general.

What are you waiting for? Pray, talk, and walk in submission, and experience the marriage you and your husband have never imagined you both are capable of loving.

One thought on “How to Make Him Love You More

Add yours

  1. What a profound and thoughtful post. I love how you made the circle of submit to your husband and husbands love their wives, leads to more submission and a full circle. I’ve always loved these verses but didn’t connect it the way you did. Thanks for your insight.

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